On rape culture

dearcoquette:

she was probably just a drunk whore who was ashamed of the sex she had the next morning

Die in a fire.

(In reference to this previous post about a woman struggling to find any source of authority that believed she was raped. The following post does not mean to address her brusque response, but the motivation behind the above question given the hellish rape-Catch-22 of the original submission.)

It’s not that women never lie, it’s not that men always lie. It’s about how we created a world where any victim is suspect. Why do we suspect victims? When did we become so panicky that we hear about someone in trouble and our first thought is “how can I resolve this for myself” rather than “how can I resolve this for this other person, who either is a victim or is suffering in some other way that she feels the need to represent herself as a victim?”

While all oppressed groups deserve more attention from those in power, these conversations do not have to serve just one person in our own minds. We all hear “feminism” and “rape culture” and presume that the points being scored are for an in-group. Even though those labels are necessary for the movement and clarification’s sake, they scare. And they scare because none of us want to give any ground.

What can be done to reveal the greater good here? How do we keep the end-game in sight as we, day-to-day, make small compromises in our own will to power and survival? What can I do through comedy/writing/culture that overturns this message of fear that continues to avalanche upon us all trying to get by?

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