Purity Ring, “Grammy (Soulja Boy cover)”

This is like if Swedish duo jj stumbled into a rave with more strobes than usual. A tight steel drum, synth daggers and chopped up howls accompany bland hip-hop pronouncements. The lyrics aren’t nearly as vacant and silly as the most fun Soulja Boy tracks are, (see: “So Fresh”) but that works in favor for Purity Ring’s robot tone, like her eyes are half-mast, behind them daydreaming about Grammys. Even through the pleading chorus, even without the modulator over her voice, she’s not really trying, and neither is Soulja Boy, and neither are the Grammys, and neither is me and get it at Earmilk

I didn’t watch the Grammys I just read them on Wikipedia but here are some thoughts even though they don’t matter

  • “Rolling In The Deep” is best record of the year out of the nominees.
  • I think people will remember Born This Way longer than 21.
  • People like white girls especially if they don’t sound like white girls
  • “All of the Lights” is an insane song that has a lot more going on in it than “Rolling In The Deep.” I also can’t visualize (auralize?) the original “Rolling In The Deep,” only the Jamie XX remix. Not a good sign.
  • hahahaha the Best New Artist category is always the worst thing ever— not in terms of winners or nominees, just proof of how out-of-touch and political this ceremony is.
  • Wow I just feel like the “Best Pop Solo Performance” category is full of songs that are not even a blip on the cultural radar. Kinda weird.
  • Amy Winehouse is dead and “Moves Like Jagger” is a juggernaut of catchy.
  • You know, if this is the year they recognize dubstep, at least they give it to Skrillex. He actually adopts other influences into his production.
  • That said, it’s a crime that Robyn isn’t included in the pop categories and winning it all. The Body Talk albums contain no low points.
  • wow, imagine a world where Mastodon won a Grammy. and smile as a single tear of bubbling pitch drips from your eye.
  • apparently I don’t listen to rock music anymore hahaha I have heard none of those nominees.
  • I also guess that I don’t listen to alternative either good god at least I have Bon Iver.
  • Chris Brown punched Rihanna in the face over and over again. If you forgive him then you trivialize misogyny. ok
  • “Otis” is cool but am I a doof for loving “The Show Goes On?”
  • “Mean” might not be the most sincere country track, but goddamn if it isn’t the cutest sugar-coated lovable song of the year. “You’re a liar, and pathetic~” ahhhh it makes me grind my teeth and squeeze bunny rabbits so cute
  • I’m glad a song called “Jesus” won best gospel performance.
  • I think My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy is a lot more important (and interesting and yeah I’ll fuckin say it better) than Adele’s 21. Even Watch The Throne captures more about the time we’re living in and sounds so full of creative energy. When has anyone ever released a rap album like MBDTF before? Sure Kanye’s rap epic is a little overwrought but I have four words about Adele: “Joss Stone except angry.”
  • At the end of the day I’ve listened to Shabazz Palaces’ Black Up more than anything nominated for a Grammy so whatever my cred is mad intact

Music exec takes out a full page ad in the NYT criticizing Grammys

This guy, Steve Stoute, is whining that the show deliberately snubbed mainstream acts (Eminem, Bieber) for the alternative performers (Esperanza Spalding, Arcade Fire.) I promise that I’ll stop talking about the Grammys after this, but a cursory glance at Wikipedia informed me that there are 6,000+ members of NARAS who do the voting for the Grammys.

If I were more paranoid perhaps I could believe that NARAS doesn’t count the votes or that they somehow convinced more than 6,000 musicians to all vote in a “contrary” way, but I fail to see where this conspiracy holds up.

Now whether or not the Grammys’ voters are actually in touch with contemporary culture— well, that’s a much better question.

Music exec takes out a full page ad in the NYT criticizing Grammys

This woman’s life is out of order. Her perception has tumbled into chaos and nothing makes sense except a wildly fanciful and especially cruel alternate reality. Justin Bieber’s loss has shattered the very fabric of her world. And she looks like an adult in her picture.

Then again I’m the one making fun of people on my tumblr so YOU BE THE JUDGE OF MATURITY HERE